Each one of my pregnancies became beautiful and dynamic in its own way. With my first born the thought of having someone to call my own gave me chill bumps. A gorgeous little person growing inside of me that would call me mommy! The only downside is that I was young. Too young to be having a child. So, with that pregnancy I didn’t receive the normal treatment pregnant women usually receive. No attention or excitement. I was an outsider in my own world.
All I can remember is how everyone was so mean to me. When I walked into a room people stared with disgust, disappointment or pure shock. Honestly, it could have been all those feelings mixed in one. As the time went by the judgement and hatred only grew. I couldn’t walk around the mall without older ladies stopping to look at my baby then walking away with snickering remarks. I hated taking my daughter to soccer practice because I dreaded being around the other parents. How old are you? How old is your child? And every other question after that became more and more insulting as the practice went on.
Apart of me wanted to give up and run. Possibility abandon my life.
But the Lord transformed me though the whole process. Eventually my skin became tough. I was used to defending myself as well as my child against this judgmental world. I learned transparency because the same people giving me stares eventually told me stories. Stories about how they wish they had the courage to go through with having their child. I started as the talk of conversation to being the only listening ear in their time of need.
My daughter made me nurturing, patient, and motivated. She gave me determination not to become another statistic and led me to graduating with honors. But most of all she contributed to my purpose in this world. Having her was the hardest, most rewarding accomplishment of my life. I thank God for her and the journey. ❤
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.